i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
