You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
