she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
