She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
