At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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