If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
His nipple licking is glorious
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