i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
