Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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