he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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