After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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