theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
