summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
