i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Randomize
