I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Alive.
So much puke
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
