dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
