If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
