We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
