Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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