Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
