He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
