fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
