I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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