let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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