nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
3pm strippers are depressing
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
