Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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