Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
