dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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