Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
