if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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