drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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