Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
