i jhust puked up my retainher.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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