Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
