# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I think my vagina is haunted
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
