I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Just cropdusted the office
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
