god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
