I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
