That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
