he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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