I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
