Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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