Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
