Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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