How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Duck Duck Cougar?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
