3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
