I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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