TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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