but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Randomize
