He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
my god I love twenty year old dicks
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
