Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Rumble strips road head = magical
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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