I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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